STOCKHOLM, Sweden — France’s Jean-Marie Gustave Le Clezio won the 2008 Nobel Prize in literature on Thursday for works characterized by “poetic adventure and sensual ecstasy” and focused on the environment, especially the desert….The decision was in line with the Swedish Academy’s recent picks of European authors”
I am a failure. The Swedish Academy did not select me for this year’s Nobel. To insult my pride on top of this injury—I did not know who Le Clezio was.
I am now entering crisis mode. Was Enghdal right to critique American literature as too insular? I don’t think my literature is in dialogue with Le Clezio. Maybe I could get his phone number and we could start one…
Here he is now:
“Ello?”
“Hello. Is this Mr. Le Clezio?”
“Oiu. Et vouoo are you?
“I’m an American calling. The Nobel has finally shamed me into dialogue with you. What global themes does your work embrace? Whose dick did you suck in Stockholm?–I mean, what book of yours should I read first?”
“I em not eenterested.”
“But Mr. Le Cle–“
BANG
There was no need to slam the phone with such force. Damn frogs never had any manners. I’m going to call Roth and Updike to commiserate. Seriously though, why does the Academy pick typically obscure, European writers?