You think I have a twisted point of view? Because I called the bard a looker?

Perhaps I was unduly influenced by his sonnets to the Dark Lady, you know:

‘My Shakespeare’s eyes are nothing like the sun; / Coral is far more red than his lips’ red; / If snow be white, why then his chest be dun; / If hairs be wires, black wires no longer grow on his head.’

We’ve all seen the engravings of the balding, scruffy poet…but only recently has a new portrait of the bard emerged and been authenticated.

Ooo la la, my aren’t we the handsome lad? Aged 46 at the time it was painted, here Shakespeare still has a youthful bloom to his cheek. Not to mention some fine duds. The Guardian reveals:

“New research revealed yesterday contends that the only portrait of
Shakespeare painted in his lifetime has been found. Debates about the real image of Shakespeare often get mired in complicated, art historical detail, but
Professor Stanley Wells, one of the world’s leading Shakespeare experts,
announced in London he was 90% certain the portrait is that of the
playwright.

Also, the story of the painting – known as the Cobbe portrait – once again raises questions about Shakespeare’s sexuality. Was he more than just good friends with the man who commissioned the painting, his patron the Earl of Southampton?”