Go Art Yourself

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This could be you!

The typical American, even with a limited interest in art, knows that those painted things hanging on the walls of museums are valuable and special. This American probably doesn’t know that a quick trip to China–well, to Made in China.com–could bring that same value and specialness to his living room wall, via an oil portrait. If you provide the site with a photograph, they’ll have their workers churn out a hand painted, 100% oil portrait of you, your family, or your dog.

If you’re more into sculpture, why not create a statue of yourself out of precious metals? You Look Like A Million will sculpt you in precious metals and gems; think Damien Hirst’s skull personallized on your coffee table. Now there’s a talking point. Note that this detail of a scupture of a boy from their website includes an iPod earbud. How modern.

For a more discreet yet fun touch, put on the cufflinks below. The head is molded to resemble your own. Everybody knows three heads are better than one. Forgive me the pun–this ridiculousness is getting to me.

For my next post, I’ll show you the wonders of the BEDAZZLER. And if you’re thinking this doesn’t count as art, why (post-Warhol) is that true?

Shakespeare, that Beautiful Bard

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You think I have a twisted point of view? Because I called the bard a looker?

Perhaps I was unduly influenced by his sonnets to the Dark Lady, you know:

‘My Shakespeare’s eyes are nothing like the sun; / Coral is far more red than his lips’ red; / If snow be white, why then his chest be dun; / If hairs be wires, black wires no longer grow on his head.’

We’ve all seen the engravings of the balding, scruffy poet…but only recently has a new portrait of the bard emerged and been authenticated.

Voila!

Ooo la la, my aren’t we the handsome lad? Aged 46 at the time it was painted, here Shakespeare still has a youthful bloom to his cheek. Not to mention some fine duds. The Guardian reveals:

“New research revealed yesterday contends that the only portrait of
Shakespeare painted in his lifetime has been found. Debates about the real image of Shakespeare often get mired in complicated, art historical detail, but
Professor Stanley Wells, one of the world’s leading Shakespeare experts,
announced in London he was 90% certain the portrait is that of the
playwright.

Also, the story of the painting – known as the Cobbe portrait – once again raises questions about Shakespeare’s sexuality. Was he more than just good friends with the man who commissioned the painting, his patron the Earl of Southampton?”

Art Reads: Straight Up or With a Twist?

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I enjoy art history straight up, but I don’t mind it with a twist. Lately, I’ve stumbled upon more than one exciting new fiction read that takes you into the art world. The fine arts get plenty of non-fiction, wether they are art historical or, like the bestselling 7 Days in the Art World, sociological. Artist’s biographies are fascinating. While I might indulge in a little creative biographical fiction, Leonardo’s Muse or whathaveyou, I put those books on the shelve right above the romance novels. I can admit to another weakness though, which developed out of a passion for Agatha Christie and art.
Art heist and forgery books get me every time, and it doesn’t matter to me if they are based on real life. Clever, with the most interesting characters (when they aren’t out and out thugs) involving passion, nerve, and wiles I love these escapades. I secretly hope that if I read enough of them I’ll be able to pull off my own heist. I just finished The Art Theif’s Guide to Paris, which, if not plausible, does involve a theft from the Pompidou and a forgery, making it the best of both worlds. The Forger’s Spell : a True Story of Vermeer, Nazis, and the Greatest Art Hoax of the Twentieth Century is on my list next.
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